Friday, May 29, 2009

Errands by Mountain Bike

Ooh, that sounds exciting doesn't it? Warning: I don't think this post is going to contain a gram of positivity. I don't get a lot of time off from racing and working right now and what do I want to do with the paltry amount of free time I do have? You guessed it! I want to ride out to the town offices in Lexington Mass in the 50° drizzle, pay me excise tax from 2003 which I just found out about, then noodle my way down to The Arsenal mall in Watertown to wait two hours at the registry to get my license renewed. You are a good guesser.

It will never cease to amaze me...the amount of effort people put into being lazy. Doing anything relating to cars and the registry of motor vehicles is such a royal, time-consuming pain in the ass, yet people work it out. They wait for hours, they take time off from work, they probably miss their kids Little League games. It's amazing there are so many cars on the road. If I didn't drive to races I wouldn't have bothered to get my damn license renewed (that and something about needing it to get a Marriage license).

While waiting (in full lycra) I was made fun of more than once by flat cap wearing dudes in pants large enough to clothe a Cape Buffalo. This really hurt my feelings because I would much rather be wearing what they're wearing, driving the lowered douche bag mobile they're driving, listening to the insipid music they listen to, and generally living their primitive, useless, retarded lives.

That's my way of saying "I'm happy being me".

Sorry, just having one of those I hate everybody except for maybe three people days. Don't worry, you're one of them.

Aah! Wait, don't go away yet, it's SingleSpeed-A-Polooza this Sunday. I have a 100% sane plan of leaving for New York at 3:30 AM "Saturday Night" (it's not like I'm going to sleep anyway). I've actuallly got one, maybe two spots left in the car (which I am now totally legal to drive). If you love Single Speeds and hate sleep (or more like sleep hates you) then you're a friend of mine and you can have a spot in the car. If you like The Stooges and stopping to pee a lot, we'll get along great.

My Misanthrope License.
I'm wearing my 29er Crew Jersey
which kind of makes me look like an
evil Army Officer from a Sc-Fi movie.


dicky said...


I get my license renewed next month, and I was going to go with the MOOTSkit.


Colin R said...

That's pretty sweet that you're wearing your kit in your drivers license pic. Shoulda kept the helmet on too!

Il Bruce said...

What's wrong with a flat cap? Quite popular in my family.

jasonwg said...

"lowered douche bag mobile"
If this were Facebook I'd click on the "like" button. While you were at the mall you should have had a relaxing lunch at Country Buffet.