Best of Cyclingdirt Coverage

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Alright, so I'm gonna chill out for yet another day and fall back on the veritable bounty of Cyclingdirt coverage I amassed over the past week. Last night was the first time I really got to sit down and watch a lot of it. Much of that stuff got posted without any kind of screening, just my memory of the interview. And they sure as shit weren't edited in any way...the interviews that is; the helmet-cam stuff is heavily edited, particularly the vids for stages 4 and 5. One thing I learned from watching all those videos is that I need to focus more on, well...focusing more. The Flip Mino (which is still on loan from the Reuters collection) I'm using has a very narrow angle on the lens, you really have to pay attention to where you're aiming the thing or, in my case, not aiming the thing — like, during the mid-point of this video where I linger a little too long on Dejay Birtch's hairy nipples.

OK so...guide to Cyclingdirt coverage. The above video is of Eric Purdue, post stage 5. Eric Purdue is awesome. He is hilarious. He is the man. But apparently some people don't get him — people like Joeseph, a dude who commented below Eric's video on Cyclingdirt. I don't like talking trash (real trash) in comments sections of blogs and I don't even walk on the same side of the street as those angry-forum-folks. Incidentally, speaking of trash, did you know that the Spanish word for trash is "chatarra?" Unlike me, you probably did. I learned this from my Guatemalan housemate in Brevard, Charlie. I guess he saw a house with a yard full of a bunch of cars and refrigerators and other assorted detritus while he was driving through Brevard and he wondered why the people who lived there kept all their "chatarra."

But back to Eric Purdue and the angry commenter...so this is what the guy said:

I'd like to show this doucebag some mercy on my own handbuilt, pristine, kick donkey ass trails!! I built Pisgah when I wasn't building my own shittt. I do like the follow your dreams bit, Nothing says follow your dreams like getting your ass handed to you by the first loser!!

- Joeseph

One trait that pretty much all people who spout ungrounded, venomous comments on the internet share is this: they can neither spell nor construct a coherent sentence. Case in point, this guy can't spell "douchebag" or "shit." Hell, he can't even spell his own name. Who spells Joseph "Joeseph." Yes I am a Thom who spells his name with an H, but at least Spellcheck doesn't flag my name when I write it. I hope, for Joeseph's sake, that he never crosses paths with Eric Purdue. Eric may not the the fastest cyclist, but if I had to choose the person I would least like to fight out of the PMBSR field, it would be him, hands down. If Joe-seph ever did the PMBSR I'm afraid he wouldn't make it past morning check in:

Joeseph: Yup, I'm just gonna sign in here, that's me right there, Joeseph with an extra E for no reason at all. Let me go ahead and...

Eric Purdue: (Standing behind JoEseph in his black and white ensemble, looking like a threatening Panda): You say your name was Joseph-with-an-extra-E?

Joeseph: That's right, you got a problem with that you shitt head, you deuce-bag?

What would follow is not a scene I can describe here. I'll just say that in homicide cases the term "debris footprint" is not usually applied. For this an exception would have to be made.

The rest of these are going to have to be a little less involved.

Below a man named "Shrimper" describes what it's like to inhabit a rancid squirrel suit for six hours in the humid 80-something degree heat of the Pisgah Forest:

Shrimper:

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The highlight of this video comes near the end, when Ozzie Open womens' leader Claire Garcia-Webb takes a dive off the podium...sober:

Stage 4 Helmet Cam

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This is my most heavily edited helmet-cam vid and the tunes are wicked good. It's also got highlights from the the kids race and the pie-eating contest. Good stuff:

Stage 5 Helmet Cam:

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The best part of this one is when a kid asks Jeremiah Bishop if he's a pro rider, he says "I try" and she says "You're AWESOME!":

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What can I say, his name is Butt and he's the funniest Australian this side of Ronnie Johns. You also might learn a little bit about how my race went from this one:

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And this, this is rad. I mounted a Helmet Hero to the head tube of local hot-shot-ripper Cory Rimmer's bike. The dude is 20-years-old and he had no problem chasing Bishop or Pearce or whoever else he felt like chasing. He wasn't racing, he was just out there training. He must be kinda scary when he races. Oh, and thanks to my buddy Bullit at Cycle 9 in Carrboro it has the best soundtrack of any of these videos. I tried to keep the music local as much as I could: Southern Culture on The Skids, Superchunk, Flat Duo Jets, and...The Monks!:

Colby Pearce, Cory Rimmer-Cam

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Shoot, I wrote a lot for someone who wasn't planning on writing anything.