Why I'm Not Here

I'm over HERE. Ah, not really even. I'm mostly out in the world and not at my computer. Of course you can always find me on the Twitters. 

The New Ride: Niner One 9 "Green Machine"

I'm suffering from a bad case of black lung from the Boston Bike Mines, but I wanted to share this: I got a new bike from JRA Cycles. And apparently posting photos of your new bike on the Facebooks is about as exciting as posting pictures of your new kid. The outpouring of enthusiasm was as staggering as...me, after three Irish Car Bombs at The Cellar. 

There is no need for me to play the naming game, like some guy who I shall only refer to as George Wisell. My friend Erich busted out "Green Machine" immediately, and it stuck. What better name for a bike ridden by a douche bag who writes a blog named after a Kyuss song?

More on this later. Probably not sooner.

Rainbow/Unicorn Bikes And Kool-Aid Pickles

Today's post will be short on words, but with photos of a bike like this, who needs words? 

New England Bicycle Expo The Final Chapter: Igleheart vs. Geekhouse vs. Budd Bike Works vs. Silky Cycles...In Space

This is the third and final installment in the New England Bicycle Expo series here on the Big Bikes. I probably could have nursed it for a couple more days, but I have a feeling that more stuff is going to come pouring in....more really awesome stuff. It might be that it's just a feeling. 

The big dog heavy hitter at NEBEs was Christopher Igleheart. He loves it when I call him that...big dog heavy hitter. His flagship at the show was a big ass randonee bike for a guy who's riding Paris Brest Paris. Or, as I say,

New England Bicycle Expo Part Two: Royal H., Icarus Frames, Folk Engineered, And Honey Badger

Ever heard of Folk Engineered Custom Handmade Bicycles? Well screw you know it all, I hadn't. That is until I attended the New England Bicycle Expo. While most frame builders came to the expo from across the street, the kids from Folk Engineered came all the way from

New England Bicycle Expo Part One: Belle Helmets, NFG Cycles, and 2nd Suit

The New England Bicycle Expo went down this past Saturday at The Armory in Somerville, Mass. I was there tabling for Roll It Forward...and every other program and initiative of Boston Bikes. It looked like something like this:

Friday Fizzle Out

It's Friday morning, I'm up an hour before I should be, and I'm sitting here drinking a coffee I probably shouldn't be. It has soy milk in it and it's been sitting out since 8:30 AM...yesterday. But I microwaved it, so that'll kill any bacteria or mold, or whatever stuff that was in it that could have killed me or given me explosive diarrhea. I figure insomnia is nature's way of telling me I should go blog about something. Of course what I should really be doing is working on SECRET PROJECT #2 for CycloWhat?

The Dog Shit on My Homework: A POO Story (Re-Published)

Yesterday I lamented, on the Twittter, that there is too much of talk of cyclocross (in fucking May) and way too little talk of poop on my Twitter feed. It got me thinkin'...when I run into Big Bikes readers out in the real world, they tell me "Ya, your blog pretty much sucked before the Kimbo Slice post, and it has definitely sucked every day since the Kimbo Slice post. I keep coming back in hopes that you'll maybe, just maybe, do something close to that good, but all I am met with is disappointment." Which is awkward. Then they tell me that, next to the Kimbo post, "The Dog Shit On My Homework: A Poo Story," a tale of how I fell in dog poop on my way to class, is the best thing they've seen on the Big Bikes blog here. Yet somehow it does not show up in the top ten most-viewed posts list over on the sidebar there, and that stupid post called "Straight Outta Brompton" does (I'm not even gonna link to it because the post already gets more traffic than it should just because of the fact that it has made the top ten list.) 

I have re-published "The Dog Shit On My Homework: A Poo Story" below in hopes that it will rise up the ranks of best viewed Big Bikes post and grace the top ten list on the sidebar. Being on that list is like being born rich — chances are you're gonna stay that way. 

So here it is BAM!

The Dog Shit on My Homework: A POO Story

Fool Of Chains/Buy My Trek Fisher Collection Sawyer

It's late and that crappy title was all I could come up with. Well, the "Fool Of Chains" part...that part's stupid and, as you'll see, wicked literal. The insomnia's back I figured I'd get out of bed, drink some herbal sleepy tea or some shit, watch some Lost and babble at you guys for a bit. Lost has uh...lost me. Once the show went into flash forward instead of backward mode things just got too depressing. I like real magic and lack of metaphor. You know that movie The Quest, starring the kid from E.T., where it turns out that the dinosaur in the rock quarry is really a steam shovel or something? I HATED that shit. It was the worst. All I know is that, if I get to the end of the series and realize that the final two seasons were as worthless as valve caps, I am gonna be pissed. I mean, if I'd known that the first two seasons of The Sopranos were the only ones worth watching, I could have added days to my life. But that's not important right now and I doubt it ever will be.

Of course, if level of importance determined what got printed on Big Bikes well...

No, There Are Limits

The sad truth of the matter is...the more I have going on, the less I write. I have done much of my finest literary work when there has been absolutely nothing going on in my life. And now here I am with so much to show and tell and what do you get? Radio silence. So I'm going to do the lay down a bunch of photos and then talk about them thing here, it will get us